I am so thankful!

real quick, before I have to go study, some things I am grateful for:

1. Heavenly father!

2. Jesus Christ, his son.

3. The Bible and Book of Mormon

4. Joseph Smith

5. Thomas S. Monson

6. My family

7. My Bf. :)

8. My friends

9.My body/my mind/soul

10. Yummy food

11. Music that rocks the soul!

12.Dancing!!

13. The world/nature

14. pictures

15. Good movies

16. Books!

17. Yummy candies

18. Shoes and clothes

19. A place to sleep

20. Warm blankets

21. This wonderful university!

22. Learning

and many more.

23. THE TEMPLE! (and this is not in order BTW)

Pompous Windbags.

Some believe that there is some kind of hierarchy of intelligence. They have the mind set of "I am smarter than you, you are dumber than me. You are smarter than me, I am less intelligent than you." Which I believe is ridiculous and unsound. 

I was sitting down and watching T.V. and the person on the show said something in their lines that had to do with something else completely. Someone in the room cried out "I know what he is talking about!" and the person next to them quietly and discreetly said "Don't you love it when you have those connections?" I was obviously not a part of the conversation, but I really didn't care. 

When there are people who believe that they are more intelligent than the next person I really don't heed them at all. If that is how they think than they really are less intelligent than they so deem themselves. The fact that one cannot spend the time to listen to someone else's view is so pompous and useless. They miss out on the sheer joy of finding wisdom in the least expected places. You guys who believe there is some few of you who has the wisdom can sit on your fat behinds on your glittering thrones all you want, i'll be out having a blast with the town idiot as he is showing me the world and all its wonders. Your missing out. 

On a totally different subject, I have a bone to pick on psycho-analysts. GGrrrr.....I may be bristling up solely because I have heard some arrogant claims towards my favorite book, but it has to do with anything in between that. You cannot psycho-analyze anything and claim that your view point is absolute. Honestly, you can have your own theories but to teach bogus in a class and make it a "fact" makes me want to smack you in the forehead. 

Sorry, I just had to vent. You should have seen me yesterday when the claim was first brought to my eyes. Let me just warn anyone in the future, if you diss something, expect a fight.  ;) 

I am the wind

So last night I was reading "real men will never sparkle" to my roommates, and I realized just how much I have written on this blog! I am like those girls wont stop talking, except I write what I am saying. In real life I don't say too much unless I have a strong opinion or I know the person well enough. But its fun to listen rather than talk. Everyone else's amount of talking, I write instead. :) 

So driving back from Utah was almost torturous. Driving by the expanding plains and rolling hills made me want to pull over and start exploring. I wanted a horse so bad to gallop over the wide open fields and forget everything. Or turn into the wind and fly over the land that hasnt been tainted by us humans. I actually came up with a story that I think is going to be fun to write. Its going to be fun because its all going to be a bit of silliness, nothing really that noteworthy but its okay. :) I will enjoy myself and isnt that what life is about? Btw, grandma's peaches are soooo good!

A voice silenced is a step closer to Hell.

In class we were discussing something that I have always had a very passionate opinion on, and that is voice. We were supposed to read an essay about the importance of opposition. The essay was about how it is important to listen to opposing sides, even if you do not agree with them. It is called "The Indispensable Opposition." But what really got me was that in the very act of discussing this well thought out essay, the class displayed exactly what we were being warned about. 

A guy in my class was telling us all about his opinion and everyone started laughing because he had messed up in his words and was acting like a brainless jock (which he isn't). Everyone, even the teacher, began to laugh and would not continue to listen to him. Needless to say he had nothing to say after that. I could feel my jaw clench and anger begin to warm my chest.

There is a quote in this essay that I really enjoyed, and it goes " I may not agree with what you say but I will defend your right to say it to the death." I get soooooo angry when others try to silence the opposing opinions (or any opinion at all for that matter). Personally, I know that I do not have all the answers and that my thoughts are flawed. I do not pretend to think that I am all knowing and what everyone else has to say is of dross. I love to hear someone else's opinion because it helps me grow! I am like a really sharp piece of glass that has flung itself in the ocean so that my edges may be softened so I do not offend the whole reason why we are here. We are here to gain knowledge, to grow from each other, to become the best people we can be. 

In the past, and present, there are people I strongly disagree with. There are people that I may never see eye to eye with on some or all subjects, but I would NEVER want them to not say their opinion. Dictators were all about one voice being heard and once people actually spoke up, they were punished. Do we want to be like Hitler? How about Stalin? You may think "I could never be a mass murder", but once you silence another man's voice we turn into the animals that we so disgust. Socrates once said "When men are brought face to face with their opponents, forced to listen and learn to mend their ideas, they cease to be children and savages and begin to live like civilized men. Then only is freedom a reality, when men may voice their opinions because they must examine their opinions." And how true that is! 

I rarely find myself annoyed or angered by others, but when I hear them snuff out an outspoken word I almost get violent. I don't care if the other person sounds like a blithering idiot, but at least they have enough self respect to say something! In this world we are all about our rights and freedoms to speak. We are all about blogging (my little blog as a testimony to that fact). Were all about thinking for ourselves (although I don't see enough of that these days, were all a bunch of sheep being herded by the loudest speaker), and were all about OUR freedoms. What about the freedoms of others?

This essay, written by Walter Lippmann in 1939, also asks a wonderful question, and that is, what is the point of freedom of speech if no one listens? "What matters is not the utterance of opinions. What matters is the confrontation of opinions in debate. No man can care profoundly that every fool should say what he likes. Nothing has been accomplished if the wisest man proclaims his wisdom in the middle of the Sahara Desert."

I wish that I were given this subject to write about in class. If so, and if we were graded on mere passion, then I would get an A+. My grammar is always wanting, and my word choice can be superficial and fickle, but my heart hammers in chest as do my fingers on my keyboard. What is this world good for if we do not have the respect for others that we so desire. Sure, I may think that what you say may be atrocious, but say it anyways! Honesty is the crowning virtue in any man. If someone says something you disagree with, speak up! But when they respond to your rebuttal, LISTEN! "If we truly wish to understand how freedom is necessary in a civilized society, we must begin by realizing that, because freedom of discussion improves our own opinions, the liberties of other men are our own vital necessity." 

Don't be a pig and believe that what you say is the only importance to society. Freedom of speech also entails the freedom of discussion, the freedom to disagree, the freedom of lively conversation. Arguments may be uncomfortable, but when has growing ever been comfortable? I am all about peace and the getting along of others, but I am also for the growing of our minds and the breaking forth of prejudices and close-mindedness. I used to be afraid to say what I thought, but now, I cannot be silenced when I have something I want to say. But, when someone also has a desire to say something or to disagree with what I had said, I am all for it. Bring it on, because I need all the help I can get, but so can you. Stop picketing and start talking. Don't go into the argument with the thought that your opponent has nothing worth while to say, because then you become an animal, literately a pig. 

Picketing, backbiting, slandering, and such shows no strength of mind, class or intelligence at all, quite the opposite really. If you have something to say and you want to edify yourself with me, COME AND TALK WITH ME! Nothing like this has happened to me recently, but I have seen so many missed good discussions because someone was lazy or had "the indifference of an empty mind" to speak up. I am so sick and tired of the profession of intelligence when their "wisdom" is at the expense of walking over those that they deem lesser in aptitude. I want to smack them on the forehead and ask whether there really is anything in their noggin' as they so allege. Give me some proof that you have the strength of mind and character to shut your own mouth for a second to gain some kind of wisdom that is beyond yourself. 

http://grossmont.gcccd.cc.ca.us/bertdill/docs/IndispensableOpposition.pdf 

That is the essay. READ IT! 

Tips on managing stress

So in class (personal health and wellness) we learned about stress. It was interesting because I learned that there are two types of stress: eustress and distress. Eustress is a good stress (the stress of graduating, of singing in front of people because you want to, planning a fun party). Of course you can guess that distress is bad. Like working 12 hours straight, hearing bad things, or having someone act rudely to you. But its interesting because good and bad stress have the same effects on you. Both are not very good with your body. If you can find a way to handle your stress you wont have to go through the exhaustion that comes from it. 

Ways to help with stress:

1. Excersise

2. Eat healthy (Fruits and veggies and good carbs.) 

3. Get enough sleep

4. Do things you enjoy (read a book, listen to music, sing etc) 

5. Visualize the thing your stress out about going well. (like if you have a basketball game, imagine yourself making a basket everytime) 

6. Go through a "relaxation" period. (going through all of your body parts and imagine relaxing them) 

7. Get a massage (or give one because they have realized that it is just as relaxing, or more even, as giving one than receiving) 

8. Breathe deep!

9. Laugh ( listen/watch your favorite comedian, watch a show that makes you laugh, be with people that laugh and make you laugh, do something silly so you laugh, or come up with the funniest laugh you can) 

We also learned about the three ways that people react to stress.

Type A: Is when someone reacts with anger aggression and very competitive. (not too good.. because they can be violent) 

Type B: (the best I believe) Takes stress in calm strides. Are relaxed and orderly about things that are bothering them.

Type C: (more common) Has a hard time dealing with it. Goes through depression, anxiety, and does not do well with revealing their emotions.

I really want to work on becoming a Type B because that way its better for you (health and emotionally wise) and the people around you. I know some people who are Type B and I think theyre awesome.

I believe I was a type C but I have been working on it. I believe that now I am becoming very close to a B. I get stressed yes, but because of the knowledge that I have gotten from my schooling (which is such a great blessing) I have found ways to cope. Its not good to keep your stresses in and your emotional dilemmas because its stupid to think that no one cares. Someone must care, and if no one does then care yourself enough to find ways that will help you go through life calmly and happily.

I need to take my own advice though and go to bed a more reasonable time than I have for a while (but I cant complain because I stay up for a good reason! :)  ) and to try to be more rigorous in my exercising. 

Anyways, have a good rest tonight. Don't forget to look out for your health as well as those you love. The people that love you want you to be happy and if your not taking care of yourself it will be hard to be happy. ;) 

My love

I sit and the rain comes pattering down, smattering the emerald leaves. My hair is wet, my skin is wet, and my hands are drenched. My heart is broken, and my eyes are down cast. Loneliness gathers as the clouds choke the sky with their grey masses. I cant hear anything but my breathing. 

I knew that there was too many sunshined days to be true. I left another man that loved me. Fear had gripped by chest and my mind closed off to happiness. 

Lost in a world of lost hope, there were steps caked with mud that clung to my soul. Dirty, dependent on the racking poison of a faithless ghost. 

My blue eyes looked up into the wet air, sparkling with tears, my lips trembled.

There were words of coddling, there were faces of concern, but my own hands needed to reach down to lift myself. 

Turning my back on feelings of despair, I followed the one road laced with daises and daffodils. When the sun lightly spread her fingers through the sky I stepped off and followed my feet. 

It was hope and it was faith that grabbed my wrists and lead me down a lane that wrapped me in warmth. 

The earth smelled of newness, fresh, and crisp. My dusty smiles came out of the boxes, and my laughter peeled like a bell waiting to be held. 

Soon, under hands of blessings and hands of healing, I found myself in a glade of possibilities.

Now I am holding your hand and I know that my persistence gave me this imaginable joy. In crystal clear eyes I find hope. 

There is something about the way that I feel when I am with you. Your arms surround me and I am lost in bliss. When you kiss me all I feel is the warmth of love that spreads from my finger tips down to my toes. I want to have you by my side until the stars sputter into darkness. I want to be with you even in the bleak of night. 

Sleeping and dreaming, your face never loses my sight, and your touch is still warm on my skin even when you are a million miles away. This place in my heart, the place that I have never given to anyone else, I give to you. This love I have never felt with anyone in the world, I feel for you.

Flying through the air my stomach jumps and twirls, I smile, and you laugh. I want to walk into the forest in my bare feet with you, I want feel you next to me every moment. 

Your words calm me and your smile lets me know that you really care.

The steps to the door are bright in the sunshine

The windows are opened and the curtains are dancing lazily in the breeze. 

Here I am, and its here with you.

Here I am, and I am home.  

What in the world is going on?

You know whats funny? I write all the time but I think I would suck at being an author. Its weird how those things work out. Even if you have a passion for something doesn't mean that you are all that good at it. I just enjoy it so much I don't care if I made people's eyes bleed because of lack of talent. (actually, if people's eyes really bled then I most likely would stop writing...hahaha) :) Im kind of in a silly mood. I wish I had my own room or my own house because I really want to dance to "My sherona" by The Knack...but my roommates would think I was weird. Correction: they already know I'm weird, they just might not appreciate it because they're trying to work on homework. 

So the guy that I am dating right now is way cool. He would dance with me if he were here. And he'd sing along and it would be great. haha We went roller skating this monday and it was really fun because I was trying to dance to the music they had there while were skating but I almost fell over every time. Luckily he's strong so he caught me. what a stud. :)

So I have really been trying to get up to date on the news on an international front because it seems like us as Americans are in this little self absorbed bubble where we don't really talk about other things that are in the world if they don't directly involve us. It bothers me a lot actually because no one really knows what's going on. We don't hear about Somalia and their government and how it has never been a stable thing. No one is talking about how we could solve that or what anyone could do. No one talks about the muslim women in Europe and the discrimination that they go through, or their dilemma between being stay at home moms and being in poverty or being successful business women. Or how about how if the Dali lama dies then his peole will be over run by the chinese and how that is a big deal because he has been their main reason for staying peaceful (if you can say that). Or how about Sri Lanka and the terror that is going on there? Why doesn't CNN show it on the news? Were so caught up in our own little squabbles we fail to see the massacres that are happening around the world. How can we help change the world if we are not even partially aware of it? Just a thought.

come on now, use your mind.

Wildness of life.

The treacheries of life keep coming. Sometimes hope bends and sometimes it breaks, but you can still hold tight. There are good times, and there are ill. The sun comes up and the sun goes down. The moon shines bright or it hides behind the clouds. But in the steps that life soon gives us, a happy heart makes life that much better. Of course things may and will happen, but with a frown the darkness deepens but with a smile the daylight begins to creep into the night. Nothing can keep you down if you are determined to find the good in all circumstances. If I had not battled with the dark myself I would not be able to say that a road traveled by one who smiles and whistles is the road that wildflowers grow. 

Whether we let "when I get ___, I will be happy" control or lives or we let "I will try to see the good in everything." control us, is merely by the choice. Try this: Smile for at least 5 minutes or more and see how you feel. When I feel down I go to youtube and watch my favorite comedians. Or I like to sing a song or dance. Find what you enjoy (that is wholesome) and do it. I promise, that when I decide to be happy, then life is so much more enjoyable. Last thursday I got an Okay grade on a test. (B minus) which is fine, but I wanted an A. I started to get down on myself, questioning whether I belonged in college. I began to cry, thoughts of self doubt clouding my mind, which I know sounds silly. As my chin quivered I remembered that if I focused on the negative, that was what I would reap. If I tried to focus my negative energy on a positive and useful thought (like determining how I could get a better grade in the future) then I would get good results. So wiping my eyes I tried to whistle a cheerful tune. It began to work. Then I sent a text message to my mom telling her I loved her. I got a drink of water and skipped down the hallways to my next class. I felt much better.

I talked to someone I really cared about about the circumstance and he reassured me and tried to get my mind off the matter. That helped a lot. (it was nice to know someone cared) I decided to not worry about it and do all I could to do better, but I chose to be happy because being happy is so much more enjoyable. 

The secret, my friends, is the choice. We have all been given our will and our agency. Lets exercise it and multiply things that are good. Why ever the reason not to? Sounds like a bunch of silliness to me. This life is to be enjoyed, not endured with a scowl. 

Saving a lady bug

So I found a lady bug outside. He looked dead. Being in the middle of the footprint.  I decided to take it inside because its so cold outside. I read a little about lady bugs and apparently they can live off their fat stores and they just need to have hydration and a warm place to hibernate. (lucky little insects) ;) When I picked him up to take the picture I realized that he had a cracked shell. :( He's resting in a little tubber-ware right now. I hope he's okay. (Cuz for some reason he is a he to me) I just came up with a name too. Bisbo. He's my pet now. But i'll let him go if he needs to be set free.