:)

Right now Jake just fell asleep on my couch. There is a pillow propped on my legs so he can lay down. He's had a rough day. He had to get up at 3:30 am and he's had so many things to get taken care of; in short he is wiped out! It was so cute cuz just when he was falling asleep he started to snore. (He's still snoring a bit now) I giggled quietly as to not wake him. He's the sweetest most wonderful guy ever. Every time I look at him, see him, or hear him I cant believe how lucky I am. I say that all of the time but its like my mind wont wrap around it! Its like a dream! I know he's not perfect or anything, but he's such a great guy. Its so cute, we'll go out and he will become best friends to any and everyone we run across. People just love him because he genuinely cares about them. I think its so sweet. He treats people with such kindness that I am so proud to be on his arm. I just hope that I can make him as happy as he makes me. I couldn't have every dreamed of being with a better man. I actually stopped believing there was such a man like him alive. I doubted the possibility of a guy being sweet, kind, adoring, fun, funny, caring, attractive, talented, silly, smart, spiritual, hard working, thoughtful, tough, wise, deep, intelligent, friendly, all around amazing guy. I know we will have hard times, when either one or both of us get on each others nerves, but I would not want anyone else to be with me all of my life than him. I have never felt this way towards ANYONE ever. I really am blessed. And I cant really ever describe it, or give it justice. Just know that I am so happy and so incredibly lucky to have Jake in my life. 

My mosaic

I know I should be sleeping but I just saw that Mckenna tagged me to do this mosaic thing and I got way excited so I did it. haha 

1. My name. well, thats my name in Chinese. I chose that because I love different languages and its a part of me, as is my name.

2. My favorite food: fruits and veggies. I love them SO much. awww...perfect. I love snacking on a cucumber or raw broccoli. yum yum

3. My high school: thats a picture of Sequim High school. Brings a lot of memories back. 

4. My favorite color: I dont really have one, so I chose the crayons because they have every color it seems in their boxes of wonder!! 

5. The place that I am now: Idaho! Potatoes, not too shocking I chose that. Mckenna's is so much prettier but I didnt want to copy. haha

6. My favorite drink: grape juice. But I can only drink it when I am relaxing, in small amounts, or sipping straight from the bottle. Yea, I know, Im strange.

7. My dream vacation: Scotland. That is a picture of an Abbey in Iona Scotland. Id love to go there.

8. My favorite treat: Bubblegum icecream in a cone. Best of both worlds. (well, I guess all three worlds)

9. What I want to be when I grow up: A good mom and a good wife.

10. Whats most important to me: Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, and the gospel.

11. A word to describe me: I love peace. I am peaceful when I am at the peak of my happiness. I dont need to be jumping around and wooting like a lot of people (though I do a lot), if I am sitting there with a smile on my face or being giggly, I am the happiest. 

12. A nickname of mine: my dad calls me paprika because I am spicy. It makes me happy :) I would also add Coodles (my mom calls me that) but I had no idea how to add that as a picture. Coodles is not even a real word. lol

Im supposed to tag someone but I dont know who looks at this so i'll tag whomever wants to do it. Sound fair? ps. thanks kenna. I loved this :) I loved yours, it was so perfect and cute. ;) 

Here are the instructions:

Step 1: Go to flickr.com
Step 2: In another window open http://bighugelabs.com/flickr/mosaic.php
Step 3: Choose 4 columns, 3 rows

Step 4: Answer the questions in the search bar of flickr and pick your favorite picture on the page and paste the address into the mosaic maker. Create the mosaic and then save it to your computer and post it as a picture. Have fun! :)

Luckiest girl ever

Right now I am laying in my bed waiting to fall back to sleep because I woke up at 5 am because I have a sinus infection and its no fun. I slept all day yesterday pretty much and now I think my body has ODed on sleep. But I need to sleep more if I want to get better. 

Saturday I got engaged!! :) :) I am so happy, so excited, and I am so blessed. Not only am I marrying the most amazing man on this planet, but I get a whole new family who are way cool. I am in Cali with Jake, my fiance, and life is great with him always here. We had to do a long distance relationship for the past semester and that was hard, but it was also good I think. Now we can be together :) were on the same track for school so now we wont be apart ever. Right after the semester ends (July 23rd) were going to get married (July 25th). Its so great. He is the sweetest, funnest, cutest, most talented, most amazing, most thoughtful, funniest, most attractive man ever. I am so lucky. I cant get over how lucky I am. The ring that now sits on my left hand ring finger makes me smile because it reminds me of how wonderful he is. Its so beautiful because its from him. I am living the dream!! And I never thought I would. Thanks to Jake. Jacob Oliver Ballentine. What a stud. 

There is no end

For class I am supposed to right a paper on a significant moment in our lives. When I was writing it this morning I realized I hadn't born my testimony on this for a long time. The two (my paper and my testimony) probably seem unconnected but trust me when I say that they are both intimately connected. 

I cant begin to say how much the Lord has changed me. Not just once but so many times in my life. First when I was a child, when I was young after seeing a ghost movie with my friends, I wondered if God could comfort me. I remember, after crawling into the top bunk, I asked my dad "does God exist?" I expected him to tell me yes, but instead he said "well, you should find out for yourself." And that got me thinking. Does God exist? 

I prayed as a child and picked up the Bible and The Book of Mormon. The more I read them, the more I realized that God did live. Not just by what they said, because any book can say anything, but by the way that I felt. There was a burning in my chest that I felt no where else. I could not fake it. But in high school I began to doubt that I was even worth any of it, and because of not understanding the Atonement, I thought that it was pointless for me to try and be a good person; I always messed up. 

Through the years and through many trials of my own, I began to come to know what the Atonement really means to me, and what Christ has done for me. Jesus Christ, the most amazing being (except for God only), actually died for me. Not just for really good people, but for sinners like me. For people who mess up everyday like me. My heart swells at knowing his heart has felt pain for my pain and that I can be perfect through and by him. Its not a question as to my ability to be perfect, but my ability to have faith that he has the power and the purity of heart to save me. Save me from not just a Hell that we all think of, but of a down cast heart, of a life not lived, a smile unused, or of unfulfilled promises. 

I know God lives. I know that he is my father in heaven, that he loves me so much, and that he is always listening to my prayers. I cant begin to tell you how much I love him. I know I dont always show it, and I bet its irritating to him (:) ), but I try. 

I am so blessed, and every day I am bewildered as to how many blessings I do have. I know that he will answer my prayers if I ask in faith and if I ask for things that I should. I know that he will guide me to places I never thought I could be. I know that this life is made with joy and that he wants us to be happy in any circumstance we are in. Not a fake happy, not a pasty smile, but a peace, a warmth inside, that even when you feel sad or depressed, he can be there to comfort you. I know this with ALL of my heart because I have felt it. I have been sad, I have been in the depths of sorrow, but he reached down and lifted me up. There is sunshine in my soul today because a God in heaven has seen it in his holy heart to save a wretch like me. 

There is peace on earth, there is hope. He is my God and I promise to him every day that I will serve him and worship him with all of my heart, no matter what befalls me. Although I am human and flawed in every aspect, I know that I can be forgiven and that someday I can be with those that I love forever and ever, in happiness and joy. Its so wonderful and I am so blessed to have such a promise and such a wonderful future.